Tough Decisions

brown wooden blocks on white surface

And I wouldn’t mind your tips, dear readers.

If you had a few extra hours in your day, and needed to get off your duff, away from monitors and aren’t particularly talented in art, cooking or any endeavors requiring coordination, what would you do?

Topic jump.

I made two extremely traumatizing decisions (for me) this week. Yeah. A momentous week, this was.

One was social. Months ago I rearranged my work schedule to get last Friday and this upcoming Saturday cleared so I could attend the retirement party of a close friend and the wedding of my best friend’s daughter.

Call me whatever you will, but I couldn’t do it. The retirement party was a congregation of about 100 people. Some gathered from other states. The wedding is set in a county where people aren’t believers in vaccinations.

While I am vaccinated and am personally willing to risk Covid (knowing it won’t be as problematic due to vaccination), I am NOT willing to be a carrier and potentially put myself in a situation where I was either incapable of helping my family if they need it or even worse, infecting them. And I know I might be needed to help in a high risk situation shortly.

Chris and I cancelled attendance on both events.

My friends are amazing. This is how blessed I am. When I called off, all parties involved expressed a complete understanding and respect for my beliefs and decisions. Amazing friends.

So that was the social.

The other was in work. You know I love my job if you follow my blog. But I’m also wearing thin. I don’t know if it’s my personal life (the baby tumor situation is 1/3 of my biggest stressors at the moment), but it’s something. To be humanly honest, I am catching myself making mistakes. Not giving the customer care I should.

So I cut back work hours. Starting Sept. 1. I’m going to only work 32 hrs a week. I’ll still stick to the four-day work week. I love it. But it will be eight hour days instead of ten.

Can I tell you again how amazing my job is? I know, eye-roll, here we go again. But can you tout amazing-ness enough?

Automattic, the company behind is letting us choose to work at 80% or 60% time….and still keep our benefits.

Now if you all want to bow in respect a bit, I understand. This is unheard of in our cutthroat world. I get that. And yet here it is. The crazy part is that this job is so stinkin’ amazing that I don’t want to stop. But clearly, to help others best, I need to be in a more focused brain-frame. For now. I might change back to full-time in the future. That is still an option.

For now, I will re-group. And these are my hard decisions.

Off-hand, two hrs a day extra doesn’t seem like much. But it’s kinda huge. It means I can catch first tracks daily on the slopes and start work at noon and only end an hour after I do now. Or I can start writing again (I was a professional writer before this job — specializing in media literacy). Or I can make something and create a store. Or exercise more and try to get tired enough to really sleep at night. So many dreams and options.

Any tips? Who’s been here before, and what can you suggest?

I look forward to the next step in life’s game…

9 responses to “Tough Decisions”

  1. I’ve never been in this situation (I wish). But, I feel like if I was given more time in the day and it was to be productive, I would use the time to be creative in some way. That may be why you aren’t feeling100% at work. Everything you seem to be doing is chore-like. Not boring but goal oriented,. Don’t you think you need to do something that is just fulfilling to you alone? A joyul thing, a semi frivolous thing? It would fill your cup mentally and allow you to focus more when it comes to more serious things. These aren’t normal times and being on edge all the time is a lot of mental and spiritual energy. I for one am burnt out and have been for about 6 months. What I did to fill my cup was my photography, yoga class, and visiting restaurants occasionally. Since, I can’t do all of my likes right now, I have to look for other ways to be creative. That has been learning to cook Korean food and watching K-dramas. I still need a new exercise outlet since I’m not hanging out in groups and working out alone doesn’t cut it.

    • You nailed it! I am looking for creative outlets. Love the learning to cook Korean food idea. And photography! Thanks for the suggestion. I’ve been exercising virtually, doing Boxing games and Beat Saber. I meet friends and family online sometimes and exercise along with them. It’s very fun. You can talk while you play/work out. Maybe something like that would work for you? Thanks for the great ideas!

  2. MUCH safer. Were they outside or inside? I probably would’ve done the same, in or out! Too many people, too many unvaxxed, yuck!

    • The events were outside. I think I wouldn’t be as concerned if I didn’t know I’d be around fragile people soon. But I couldn’t conscientiously expose myself to known potential issues knowing my upcoming circumstances.

  3. You’ve had a lot on your mind with lots more on the way. Trudy’s ideas are well thought-out and beautifully presented. I hope you find just the right things to do for rejuvenation.

    • Thanks. Chris read Trudy’s response and was also very impressed. So insightful. The WordPress community is so amazing!

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